Fanfic (1)

"Kiyoung ah, can you visit Jinki when you finish school? Jonghyun told me that he's sick, so can you go there and visit him for me?" My mum texted me when I was having my maths lesson. Upon reading that, my eyes grew wide.

"What? You mean I'm going to SHINee's dorm, myself?!"

Don't get me wrong, I've been to their dorm before, whenever my family visited Jonghyun, along with his family. Since both my family and I are related. It was pretty surreal, as I didn't know that my family is close to a member of my favourite boyband! However I think SHINee doesn't really know that I'm a fan, since they see me as someone who is related to Jonghyun, by bloog. But believe me, whenever I go to their dorm with my parents every year, my heart starts to beat very fast.

Looking at the text, I smiled to myself. Great, I don't have to go back home early, I don't have to see my brother's irritating face. Therefore I was quite impatient for my lessons to end, when it finally does, I quickly packed some books in and rushed out of my school, to catch the bus to head to their dorm.

It just took 15 minutes to travel from my school to their dorm, by taking a public bus. Upon reaching the doorstep, I rung the doorbell. Soon, Taemin opened it and greeted me with his usual innocent smile,"Hi noona, thanks for dropping by to visit Jinki hyung." I went in, and I saw them decked in black clothes, and their hair styled. I guess they're getting reading for their schedule. Except for Onew, who was in his own clothes, coughing and helping his members whenever he can.

"He's seriously a leader" I thought to myself. "Even though he's sick but he still helps his dongsaengs whenever he can."

But when Onew went up to key to help him fix his hair, Key freaked out."Yah! Hyung, stay away from me! I don't wanna get infected!"

Onew simply laughed and said,"I'll make sure you'll be sick in a few days time." I looked at them in sheer awe. I've never seen them so close like a family.

I was enjoying it until Jonghyun came up to me and said,"Hey, thanks for coming. Do help me take care of Jinki hyung for me, I told your mom that you'll be back late due to this. Anyway, he can be a bit wild, especially when he's sick." He laughed at his own joke.

"No worries," I said. "Do your schedule with ease. He'll be alright." Then I saw Key telling Onew,"Remember to take your medicine, twice a day, and whether you like it or not, NO MORE FRIED CHICKEN UNTIL YOU RECOVER."

"Yes yes Kibum, I get it. I'm 21 for goodness sake. God, you're such a umma." Onew plainly replied. I laughed whilst hearing their conversation. And minho came up to me and said,"We always get this all the time with Key being like this. He meants it well, really." Not knowing how to react, I just smiled at him and nodded.

"Alright guys, we have to go. Manager hyung is waiting for us." Jonghyun said to them. Since Onew is unable to be with them, Jonghyun had to take charge. When sending them off, Onew asked me," Thanks for being here to take care of me. So, are you hungry?"



Apparently this is my first time writing a fanfic, got alot of out-of-points, but nevermind. Didn't bother to check. :)

Rant.

Stop thinking that you know what I'm saying towards you, cos in a matter of fact, you don't. Seriously I was on the verge of screaming at you, asking you to get the hell out of my room. A smallest thing that I did, you'll scold me for until god knows when. Anyway I'm not petty to write about this, what I'm angry about is this.

You want to know why I'm angry right? Why I'm stressed right? Why I cry right? Simple. It's all because of YOU. YES. YOU. Everything just scold, anything just scold. Like your whole world revolves around the word "scold". I think my Mom isn't like this, at least she dosen't scold me for a long long time. Don't you know that I hate people to stress the things that I done wrong? Look, I get what you mean. REALLY. Just go straight to the point. Stop going one big round and say what you want to say, cos I don't really understand, which is good, I don't intend to listen. In a nutshell, YOU STRESS ME OUT.

And stop assuming that you know what I'm saying, that you know what I'm thinking. Cos your prediction is super way out of point compared to what I'm thinking. You know I hate people who puts words into my mouth, who makes false assumptions about me. Look, I have some people who are doing that to me, and I thought you don't, I guessed I was wrong.

You know when I heard what you said about me, I was so angry, really. I really wanted to take a chair and throw it at you, asking you to shut up, and get out of my room, and asking you to leave me alone.

Want to put this like a military boot camp? By all means. I DARE YOU. Being in NS for 2 years dosen't mean that you can barge in and take full control over me. Yes, I know I can be rebellious, but what you don't know is that I can control my rebellion side of me, and I can control my anger. Not like you, who simply vent your fustration onto me.

Sooner or later if you still do this, I'll not hesistate to shout at you, & I won't care about some respect respect thingy which you keep telling me about, and I'll really give you a piece of me, which I kept it in my heart for like 4 years. I don't want to tell you all this, cos I don't want to cause another war.

Never estimate the power of a angry women. Especially me. Do not test me.




Okay, I actually wanted to write a fanfic here, but due to some stupid incident that cropped up just now, I'll delay it. Anyway I private-d my blog, so, yeah.

Hey mister.

You and I, are nothing more than friends, well, maybe aquaintances, ever since the incident. I admit it, it was my fault when I forced the answer out of you. And probably it's your fault too, when you gave me some clues for me to decipher and figure it out. I think the impact was very big and huge for me to handle. Believe me, even until now, I'm still quite shocked about it, really. Anyway, believe it or not, I apologise for what I've done, I've avoided you, and I'm sorry.

But, I wish to stay like this until I can overcome the guilt that I have created for both of us.
Please understand that it's mostly my fault that we have become like this, not yours.

Yes, I find you a nice person, whom I can talk to, even though you're older than me by 5 years. Even though your singing sucks, but your singing keeps making me laugh. Yes, I miss whacking you and bullying you. Always call you cos I'm bored, always texting you when I'm bored or when I need someone to kajiao.

I kept thinking of this for a long long time, until recently.

What you've done, you should know. Even though you wanted to ask me what's wrong and what's going on, I believe you're smart to know what's going on. You even sent me emails, whom I don't even bother to reply and read, cos I don't even have time for that.

I'm facing my national exams soon, and yet you're indirectly distracting me with what you're doing. You know very well what you're doing. If you can do yourself good, please stop with what you're doing now. I don't want to get distracted. I'm already feeling so guilty to what I did. So stop making me feel so guilty.

I don't want to talk to you anymore. Stop being like this. I hate it.
I'm sorry to say this, but sooner or later, if you persist to what you're doing, I'll start to hate you. Alot.

I'm starting to hate you.


I'm just feeling quite uncomfortable with the incident, so this post is kind of a ranting post to someone. :)

You make me sick.

I just don't know why, don't get me wrong, but I think I'm too easy for you to play around with, using your little fingers to do all these. Uhm, scuse me, please remember that I was the one who helped you with all your daiji and all that stupid things that you want me to do. I was stupid enough to heed your orders.

That's why I don't intend to talk to you anymore.

Ever since that incident a few weeks ago, I reflected on myself, and you know what? I realised that I'm not in the wrong, you are. But apparently you don't know that. Texting me about all these, and trying to make it up for me, please, let me tell you, it's all backfiring.

Basically you just want someone to listen to your complains and not listening to people's advices and all that crap. You just want someone to shower lots and lots of attention on you. Please lah, I'm getting fed up with all your nonsense. Help you by giving you advice, and FORCING you to do the things that are right, you don't want to listen. So what for help you? Everytime you complain to me about her, I always don't listen, even though sometimes I'm in it, because I'm independent enough to settle my own daiji, but you don't. You'll always ask other people to settle daiji for you, then if that person kenna trouble, you don't care. Good, you got someone already, that's why I'm leaving.

You know what, I understand why is she like that, I'm sure, whenever I pass by you not looking at you, you confirm say bad things about me behind my back to my other friends, that's so typical of you, because you do that to her. Actually, I sympathise with her, even though I don't even like her. I don't think she's a Bitch, really. You're not in a position to call her one.

I was stupid enough, but I'm smart now, I'm not getting close to you anymore.
Goodbye, attention seeker. :)

X.

FML.

This kind of feeling, that sheer objection, betrayal and rejection. It sucks big time. Really, pinky swear. Anyway I'm not here cos I want to proclaim that I shall forsake my pretty tumblr for the good ol' blogspot, No.

I'm just here cos I feel darn moodless and screwed up so that's why I'm writing this down here.

I shall try to keep my spirits up, even though I'm still hoping for that tiny glimpse of hope for tomorrow. If there's nothing, then we're not fated to have it then, and I sincerely apologise for it.

Shit man.

It's always these times.

Hello.
I know more about you today. ^^ It seems that you have changed, and you're different that I've known in the past. A different person, and a different you. Which is good, maybe, or bad, I'm not so sure. But what I'm sure is, I've never regretted staying put in my decision. Actually thankfully I decided to disappear before you know it. Thank goodness I found it out early, I think the impact will be much lighter if I know it myself rather than you telling me. You see this? GOOD. Let this stay in your brain of yours, and let it be imprinted there, forever and ever. :)

Love,
Muah.

I'm contemplating whether I should revive this blog, or just make it as a time capsule, cos no one's reading it, except me and some losers who has nothing to do.

School's tomorrow, I hate school, but I love SHINee. & I love Onew. ^^

XOXO.

Good evening people. :)

It's been ages since I've updated something here. :) Probably like, 6 months already hmm? It's really a long time I agree. So, since I'm now quite bored, & nothing to do, I shall just post something, for the sake of posting. I reckon no one's gonna read, cos my main blog's at Tumblr. :)

Lot's of stuffs happened ever since the last post I've written into this cosy little blogger blog of mine. :) Some good, some bad. I don't wish to elaborate, but all I can say its that it's just parcel of life. It's just some teenage life that I'm going through. I've been through shit, I've been through blessings. It's like a wave, constantly going up & down.

I've finished my CA1, & as well as my mid-years. All that's left is my Prelims and finally Ns. Come to think of it I can agree that time passes really fast, which really scares me. I still can remember the first day of 2010, like it was just yesteday. I can agree, Life's really short.

I've stepped down in Band, which is a big relief for me. But I still have to go back, and practise for the competition.

I can finally do my Photography medium as my N level art. :) It's really hard to do, but I do hope it's all worth it, cos it's the proccess that counts. I'm learning more deeper into photography, I just attended a 1 day intensive workshop done by Gabriel Mendes today. Quite tiring, but I learned alot.

I've looked through my previous posts in my blogger, I was so naive back then. My english was total crap. But I want to write more literate. :)

So, in conclusion, that's about all, from the previous date until now, that sums up my current update, ever since I've forsaken my blogger for tumblr, until now. & I think i'll update this again in a few months time.

It's like a time capsule.

We can take nothing with us

"Having more (worldly issues) does not keep you from wanting more. And if you
always want more - to be richer, more beautiful, more well known - you are
missing the bigger picture, and I can tell you from experience, happiness will
never come." - Have a Little Faith, by Mitch Albom.

Just finished mugging for my chemistry. Gawd, it's like 15 A4 pages long man. I think that's the longest i've ever written. Hahaha. Who knows? I can make a textbook out of this topic. (: I'm such a good girl, that's why I mugged. (:

Actually I have nothing much to write about today. Well, had tuition for maths, went to eat, just normal ol' routine. Going to Bishan home tomorrow for CIP. Will bring my camera there. For Art purposes, and also to train my skills. I guessed it sucked.

"Now, that child," He said,"Reminds me of something out sages thought. When
a baby comes into the world, it's hands are clenched, right?" Why? Because a
baby, not knowing any better, wants to grab everything, to say, "The whole world
is mine."
But when an old person dies, how does he do so? With his hands open. Why?
He has learned the lesson.
What lesson? I asked. He stretched open his empty fingers.

We can take nothing with us."

Just trust me.

School's this week is pretty shag sad to say. Totally slept during Emaths today cos I was really tired to the max. Should have known to drink coffee first before school starts. O level came out last monday, and I kpo go and see. I shouldn't have done that, cos I felt damn stressed when I realised that the top student of the school had 8 DISTINCTIONS.

wtf mans. I don't think I can do that.

BUT. I got pay attention in class now okie!! I remember last time I always never listen, I kept drawing and doodling. In front of teacher somemore! Power uh? But I got study la, only 2 hours a day only.
BUT FOR THIS YEAR, i'm gonna chiong study. I'll study like I got no life like that.

Chemistry, #%$#^@ uh. It's such a simple topic to understand, yet she go and teach like the subject like O level subject sia.
She teaches the class like she is teaching a elite JC or something. HELLO, I'M JUST SEC4NA PLEASE.
I still don't catch no balls on history lor. Like in World war One, shouldn't be named world war 1 lor. It's only Russia and Germany got taiji, then suddenly poland and all the other countries come kpo, come fight like they damn sian like that. Like nothing to worry and fight for fun. Either that, or they happy not happy come find other countries daiji like that. HAHAHAHA. zzz

Recess, i screamed.
I was talking to Byron when Matthew showed a lizard STRAIGHT AT MY FACE. wth manz. I screamed. Damn sia.

Let us all chiong study damn bloody hard and crush all the smart alecks in all the good schools. Come la. HAH.(:


Today I've realised who were my true friends are. They are the people who wouldn't bitch about you behind your back,
but they bitch about you straight in your face.
I don't live my live to please them.
Anw, thanks guys for today. (:


11 months of knowing, destroyed by one simple line.

ignore this if you want.

I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS.

I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS. I MUST LOVE EMATHS.

Damn, I do hope this type of "self-motivation" will help me like maths, so that i can study and prolly practise it. Heh. Even though it's the same maths teacher like last year, (I totally hate him la.) but who cares? Still, it all boils down to ME. ME. ME. Teachers are here to help you. But still it all relys on yourself. True?

Even though he keeps going to the girl's side to teach, i don't know why, but so what? I really don't pay attention to him, (okie la, sometimes, if I learn a new topic). Then i'll just continue with my excercise practises. It's a improvment okay! Last year I don't really give a shit about mathematics. But this year I told myself that I wanna ace my maths, so I'll be considerate for once and start doing questions in class.

But sorry hor, I don't wanna ask him for questions. But I'll do maths excercise until I speak math. Pardon the Pun.

Besides Maths, I also need to self-study for chemistry. Seriously lor, she teach preparation of salts, I totally CMI. She teaches like how she teach the elite schools. FYI, she didn't teach in a elite school, prior to my knowledge.

Okie la, I can understand. ABIT ONLY LOR.

So in conclusion, i shall self-study Elementary Mathematics, and Combined Chemistry.

Full stop. Thankyouverymuch.

Off to the books for "contentment." First up, *shudders* Maths.

PS: I'm currently listening to ordinary, by Nikkishido Ryo. He sings damn well!! (L)

survivor.

One week is over. I survived.
I'm proud to say that.

First day of school, well done, we received a wonderful preach made by our new principal. I almost slept when he talks.

Some teachers are the same as last year's.

Band's changed to wednesday and friday. I studied like shit.

Yeah, that's about all.

Final prep.

Half packed, and not ready to go.

I hate packing, cos I know the stuffs that I put inside my bag, will last me for a WHOLE YEAR. I'm leaving a world named Holiday, to go back to a world named, SCHOOL. Some people will look forward to it. Some aren't sure about going back to school.

I do know I don't look forward to it. *smiles*

I'm not gonna write about how I feel about coming back to Dunearn. Cos better believe it or not, I don't trust my feelings now. My faith is like a tiding wave, going up and down constantly.
Ah, just to summarise it up, I'm scared.

I'm scared of my N's. Seriously.

It'll be 15 hours more till the First day of school starts. Thankfully it's monday, so I can get to sleep in more. For one extra hour actually.
I gotta cherish this final day, cos I do know when tomorrow comes, and I enter Dunearn, there's no turning back. I'm forced to go. Jeez.

I'm so gonna have a heart-to-heart talk with Pop tonight. Straight after I come back, and bathe, and in the midst of doing QT, which I haven't been doing for like don't know how many donkey years ago.
I wanna do QT, it's just that I can't really find my bible.

Sheesh, that's excuses. I shall take note, I shall find my bible once I come home. STRAIGHT. I don't care.

Anyway, I need to pray for the upcoming days of relentless schooling that I'm going through. I'm sure that new principal will slave drive us to the max, pumping us with lots of maths formula, chemistry formula, english adjectives, multiple source-based questions, essay writings,and as well as giving us Infinity homework.

Cos I know I easily get distracted, for this 2010, my main objective? I MUST ACE MY RETARDED N LEVELS. like it or not.
That means i need to love maths. Which seriously I don't. I don't give a shit about band anymore. Okie, wait I do. But studies is my first priority. Band is the second. Anyways, I'm gonna step down soon.

Thank god it's a super long post. Cos I won't be posting this for a matter of 7 days.

Till then. Let my Faith towards Him increase.

See ya.

2 days.

I'm starting school in 2 days time. And I can expect lot's of changes in my school's faculty, facility, system, etcetc.
New principal
new juniors
new teachers
new timetable
How "zai"

Well, at least there's one same thing.
N LEVELS. One word=Sian.
But wait? This ain't my character at all.
Don't care. I shall face this damn national exam head on.
And also, most importantly, with God's help.

You can say I'm ready for school.


Uh wait. I haven't buy my file, and as well as my school shoes.
Okie, around 98% ready. (: